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Don’t Waste Your
Time
As Susan and I were going through our last three
months together, there were times when we both expressed regrets for mistakes
made during our journey together.
Several times I felt the need, in my sorrow, to apologize for every rotten thing I had ever put her through and she repeatedly assured me of her forgiveness. She even told me I didn’t need to keep apologizing for things in the past.
Several times I felt the need, in my sorrow, to apologize for every rotten thing I had ever put her through and she repeatedly assured me of her forgiveness. She even told me I didn’t need to keep apologizing for things in the past.
The past…….to me, that is one powerful thought. The past is the place where all regrets are
stored. The past is a place full of
missed opportunities and chances ignored.
While much is contained in the past – both the good and the bad, it must
be realized that it is one of the places we can never get back to no matter how
much we wish we could. While I was
expressing the need for forgiveness for my shortcomings, Susan not only forgave
but she also gently reminded me of the things that were good and right and for
which we could be thankful.
In a conversation I had with a pastor friend – after Susan
was gone – he asked me if I had any regrets and what might they be. After giving this question several long
moments of thoughtful consideration, I replied that I regretted all the wasted
time and I went on to explain just what I meant. I certainly did not want to leave him with
the impression that I might have viewed the time Susan and I spent together as
wasted.
When two people decide to share their lives with each
other and form a loving partnership, one of the most valuable resources they
have – in only a limited supply – is the time they get to be together. In looking back, I can see where I wasted
some of that precious time and along with that are the missed opportunities
those moments might have contained.
As young people start out together, they tend to view
their future together as “forever” and speak of the road ahead as, “the rest of
our life” – without giving real thought to just what that means. This was certainly the case for me. The road ahead was to be full of endless
opportunities for hugs and kisses, long walks and activities, deep/meaningful
talks and loving moments together. Even
though we might have had an intellectual awareness of an eventual end, I
certainly didn’t grasp the fact that it is that very end that makes the intervening
time such a valuable and limited gift to be cherished and not wasted.
All couples have quarrels, arguments and disagreements
– working through such times is a necessary and healthy part of building a
relationship together. However, I look
at the time wasted by holding on to anger or resentment longer than necessary
(over some silly little thing where I thought it was important to be “right”)
vs. swallowing my pride and quickly getting back on track. Behind this is always the thought that there
will be plenty of time later to resolve any conflict. During those times, I now wonder how many
opportunities (to spend loving time together) I cut myself off from. The answer is that I simply don’t know but I
do know I can never get them back. I
also know that if given the choice today (during the course of a disagreement) how
I would decide if I were offered either a hug or the chance to stand there
indignantly holding on to a belief that I’m right. The opportunity for the hug is gone and
whether or not I was right simply doesn’t matter.
If you knew that you only had a day, a week, a month
or a year left to spend with the person you love, what would you do
differently? How much of that time would
you be willing to waste? How much
different would your priorities be? If
you knew your time was limited, what is the first thing you would do? …….
Perhaps you should consider doing just that because your time is limited –
don’t waste it.
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