The Prodigal Son – Twenty-first Century Version

The story of “The Prodigal Son” is one I learned as a child and there is a very good chance you’ve heard it as well; for it is a story that is over 2000 years old. For any who may not have heard it and who might be curious, I’ll end this short piece with a synopsis of the original story. As I followed a particular story line in the media recently, the thought occurred to me to write how today’s version would likely read.

There was a fairly well off middle-class father that had two sons. One day the younger one said to his father, “Hey dad, I shouldn’t have to wait for you to die before I get my share of the estate, gimme it now and then I’m outta here.” So, despite the hurtful nature of that comment, the father divided his property and gave the younger son his half.

“Not long after that, the younger son got all his stuff together and set off for a distant country where he blew his whole inheritance on partying and wild living. After he had spent it all, there was a severe famine in that whole country, prices of everything shot way up and the young man began to be in real need. In desperation he agreed to work, for a citizen of that country, on a farm . He was given the job of feeding the pigs. The young guy was so hungry by this point that he even considered eating the pig’s food, for this time there was no one to come running to his rescue.

********* - Now at this point, the story changes somewhat from the original******

When he finally took a good look at his current circumstances, he said, “The old man is rich, he’s got tons of money and even his hired servants have more than me, and here I am starving to death!” He thought to himself:

“Screw this, I’m outta here. I’m going back to my father and say to him, ‘Look at the mess I’m in because of you. When you gave me that money a while ago, it wasn’t enough and now the cost of everything is going up. You ripped me off man and I want more – at least enough to live in the style I’ve become accustomed to!’”

So he got up and went back to his father’s home.

While he was still some distance from home, his father learned he was coming and feeling a great burst of excitement as well as a huge sense of relief, he started out to meet his wayward son.

After a quick “Hello” and brief hug, the son started in with his demands. The son said to him, “Look at the mess I’m in because of you. When you gave me that money a while ago, it wasn’t enough and now the cost of everything is going up. You cheated me and I want more – at least enough to live in the style I’ve become accustomed to!”

The father said, “I want to help you son – and I will. First, let me explain the situation here and why I can’t meet all your demands.” The father tried to tell his son that the remaining portion of the estate was (as agreed before) to go to the older brother and therefore the father could not give any of that to him. He told him that times were tough here as well and he didn’t have any extra money to give him but he’d gladly give the young man some work to do and would provide him with a place to stay, clothing and good food to eat.

The young man felt enraged and said, “Why should I work for you? I’m entitled man. You owe me and I’m gonna get what’s mine!” He didn’t want to hear about how hard everyone else (including his older brother) was having to work to pay the bills and make ends meet – he just wanted what he figured he was owed; even if the old man had to borrow in order to give it to him.

The young man then stormed out and got a bunch of his dead-beat friends and together they all went back to his father’s home. There they all set up a huge protest and demonstration. The father tried to reason and compromise with the son but just as the son was unwilling to work for his father, he was also unwilling to compromise or consider anything except getting what he felt entitled to.

As the days progressed, the protest grew. More riff-raff joined the crowd and they started to get both destructive and even violent. They set fires, destroyed property and even prevented those in the father’s home from coming and going freely. Some of the protesters took note of the fact that some of the neighbouring homes showed promise for protesting – as far as they were concerned, the problem had spread well beyond some kid and his old man. They decided to expand their extortionist ways and protest all the neighbours (who they now referred to as “privileged” and the “one percent”).

Unfortunately this is where the story stops because it’s still being written. How it ends…I don’t know…stay tuned…

Now, the original story goes like this:

A man who has two sons and the younger of the two asks his father to give him his portion of the estate as an early inheritance. The father gives it to him and the son then sets off on a long journey to a distant land where he wastes his fortune on wild living. After the money runs out, a severe famine hits the country and the son finds himself in dire circumstances. He takes a job feeding pigs. He is so broke that he even considers eating the food assigned to the pigs.

The young man finally comes to his senses and remembers his father. In humility, he recognizes his own foolishness, decides to return to his father and ask for forgiveness and mercy. The father who had been watching and waiting, receives his son back with compassion and open arms. He is overjoyed by the return of his lost son! Immediately the father has his servants prepare a giant feast in celebration.

Meanwhile, the older son is not one bit happy when he comes in from working the fields and discovers a party going on to celebrate his younger brother's return. The father tries to dissuade the older brother from his jealous rage explaining, "You are always with me, and everything I have is yours.” He adds that they had to celebrate the return of the younger brother, “because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.”

If you've read them both, you will recognize that one is a story of redemption and the other is a story of entitlement. You should be able to recognize the difference.

Where Did She Go?

I met Susan Edith Mosier in 1969 at Kingsway College. She was fifteen, I was sixteen and we dated steadily for the next three years. Among our friends there are a number, I’m sure, who can recall this budding romance. With all the functions and activities, choir practices and tours, there was scarcely enough time for school and classes. We were together as much as possible and three years later, in 1972, we made a lifetime commitment to each other as we took our vows in marriage.

There were many who, out of love, expressed their concern that we were much too young to be making such a commitment and they feared that it would not last. Ours was not anywhere close to being a perfect union and many times (especially in the earlier years) we went through times when we thought it might not last. Both of us did and said things, at times, that we would later regret but through the fights and the make-ups, through the good times and bad we always chose to remain together and our love reached a depth I couldn’t have imagined as a 16 year old kid.

Just a very short time ago, on January 5, 2012, we had to say our final good-bye as cancer took her life and robbed her of her of any remaining years. Susan fought hard with much courage and dignity but the disease was aggressive and cruel. Many friends and family fought the battle with her and she drew strength from all who lent it through their prayer, kind thoughts and encouraging comments and wishes. While the cancer ultimately proved fatal, death is not - and cannot be – the final victor. While I miss her now (terribly) I plan on someday catching up with her once again.

As I sit and ponder all this and what has transpired over the past four months, I’m filled with a number of questions and a variety of conflicting raw emotions. I feel pain and sorrow, as my eyes repeatedly fill with tears. But I am also able to laugh with friends as we recall some of the humorous moments we all shared with Susan. When I see the expressions of love from so many people who knew her, I am humbled and grateful. As I begin to realize that God’s love for Susan is even greater than my love for her and the love of all her friends combined, I begin to experience a sense of comfort and peace.

Susan had fifty-eight years between her very first breath and her very last breath. When I was standing at her side, after she was gone, I thought about those 58 years. Something had been completed that day; she had written the final chapter in the book of Susan. I know how profoundly she had touched me and my life, as she lived that book, and I know from the testimony of many others how she had touched them. When talking with friends and family, I realize there are special chapters which she shared with them that I never knew – for they were not meant for me – and I begin to get a glimpse of just how complex a person she really was. That which she shared with me over a period of 42 years was volumes…and yet she was so much more than that; her life and work went so much further.

During the last few months of her journey she focused mostly on Danny and me – to prepare us for when she was gone. She decided she would battle the cancer for as long as she could but she also knew her time was short and she decided she wasn’t going to waste any of it by getting negative, angry or complaining. She said she wanted to use her remaining time being with and enjoying her family as much as possible. She took time and spent valuable energy teaching us and making sure we could carry on the various necessary household tasks that, up till then, she had always done. She taught us how to cook and prepare various meals. Many a conversation began with, “When I’m gone, you and Dan will need to …”

On December 14, after spending a week in hospital, Sue was due for discharge home. She had gotten very ill that morning and so the doctor decided to keep her in hospital for an extra day and discharge her on December 15 (her birthday). That evening when I went to visit her, I discovered there was to be a Christmas celebration in the main cafeteria. They were going to be lighting the lights, welcoming the Christmas season and several groups were going to put on a small concert. Susan felt well enough to go and so she got her walker and off to the cafeteria we went. I didn’t know then that I would only have 22 more days with her.

One of the groups at the concert was a women’s choir and they sang, “Song For A Winters Night” by Gordon Lightfoot, as sung by Sara McLachlan. As they were singing, Susan tucked her arm in mine and began to hold tightly. I looked at her and saw she was sobbing and her face was wet with tears. I asked her if she was alright – did she need to go back to the ward? She said no, that she was OK … she said, “It’s the song, I know the song.”

I’ll end this here with the words of that song to follow.

Susan’s loving husband, Roger Hild

Song For A Winters Night - by Gordon Lightfoot

“The lamp is burning low upon my table top
snow is softly falling
the air is still in the silence of my room
I hear your voice softly calling

If I could only have you near
to breathe a sigh or two
I would be happy just to hold the hands I love
on this winters night with you

Smoke is rising in the shadows overhead
my glass is almost empty
I read again between the lines upon each page,
the words of love you sent me

If I could know within my heart
that you were lonely too
I would be happy just to hold the hands I love
on this winters night with you

The Fire is dying my lamp is growing dim
shades of night are lifting
morning light steals across my window pane
where webs of snow are drifting

If I could only have you near
to breathe a sigh or two
I would be happy just to hold the hands I love
on this winters night with you
And you'll be once again with me”

No Problem

“Thank you so much for your help.”
“Not a problem”

“Thanks for doing that, I really appreciate it”
“Hey, no problem”

OK, so I guess the problem’s mine

…or at least it qualifies as a pet peeve...but whatever happened to “You’re welcome?” I’ll grant you that a, “no problem” is possibly marginally nicer than a hearty, “whatever,”…but not by too much.

When someone has helped me, the appreciation I express is genuine. Sometimes my “thank you” isn’t enough to express the depth of my gratitude - and so I’ll make an extra effort to let the other person know that I’m very thankful for their assistance. In days gone by, the reply might have been, “my pleasure” (as in, “it was my pleasure to help you”) or “You’re welcome (to the help).

These days the reply simply implies that I’m not a problem (yet) but somehow it kinda leaves me feeling cold and wondering if I should replace my thanks with something else. Perhaps something along this line:

Me: (After asking for assistance with something) “So, was that a problem for you?”

Them: “Hey, no problem”

Yeah, that kinda works……….

Our State Religion (or…The Devil’s in the Progressive Details)

The apparent trends in our culture and the direction in which we are headed are, I believe, a serious cause for concern. It seems to me that the main objective of the Liberal-left is the removal of our God-given rights and basic personal freedoms. The intent it seems, is to replace them with state granted entitlements, “privileges” and virtue signalling pronouncements. Individual freedoms... in fact individualism itself, is an anathema to them. Apparently they would much prefer that we all simply become a part of the societal organism and collective mind. Freedom of speech therefore – in a liberal world – becomes freedom to speak in a state defined politically correct manner, so long as it:

a) doesn’t offend anyone,

b) declares only the “truth” as determined by the state,

c) doesn’t contain any state determined “hate” language, “triggers” or “code” and

d) meets all other necessary, to-be-determined, state regulations.

Today’s progressive liberal mindset is geared toward creating division amongst people. It selects and then sets aside various “identified groups,” as determined by special interest, race, gender and “victim” status. These divisions are then used to control individual speech even further. Such groups are granted special status for treatment and concepts commandeered to insure politically correct speech consisting of redefined words and terms i.e. racism, prejudice, marriage, bullying and hate to name just a few. All this is done to insure such special status can never be questioned and so that any contrarian personal values and views can be vilified.

In a “Progressive/Liberal world, the right to worship and freedom of religion becomes a carefully and suspiciously monitored privilege. Practically speaking, freedom of religion seems to mean nothing more than your right to decide which church you may attend (if you must) and beyond that, matters of conscience will be determined by the state. Your children are no longer your own, because now the state has declared themselves a co-parent. They will determine how the child will be raised, what they must be taught (socially – not just academically) and what they must believe. The hoped for result is that they can all one-day become fully indoctrinated and good little socialist liberals.

At this point in our history, what has happened to create such a strong embrace of left-wing Marxist ideology? It is my opinion that this move toward socialist liberalism is no overnight phenomenon but has been orchestrated with much planning. The move, to the left, has been accomplished by prolonged, venomous attacks on personal freedoms and individual rights. This attack has been accompanied by repeated attempts to demonize a successful capitalist system. Over the years, our system of capitalism does have its’ flaws nevertheless it has supported a high degree of financial freedom and prosperity. I believe there may be several answers to my question about why this push toward Marxism. I suspect that a major motivation is the desire to move all power, control and wealth away from the individual and place it in the hands of the state. The ruling class will then centralize control to achieve an almost god-like power and authority. That’s my opinion – what’s yours?

Wandering in the Desert

As a young lad growing up, I learned many stories from the Bible. One such story is about the children of Israel and their forty year trip wandering through the desert. What stood out to me were all the amazing instances of overcoming impossible odds, epic battles and the countless victories and survival despite the harshest of elements. Despite all this, the journey was frequently interrupted by periods of complaining and condemnation with occasional brief episodes of rebellion. If you are anything like me, perhaps you were led to wonder why, despite an abundance of miracles, the Israelites seemed to continually show a lack of faith whenever confronted by various obstacles or difficulties.

Right from the start, beginning with Moses and the Burning Bush, I would find myself scratching my head in puzzlement. Here, despite an obvious miracle, we find Moses arguing and resisting. God is asking him to do something, telling Moses that He will be with him and is promising the successful outcome. Even then, Moses resists and wants God to find someone else. To my way of thinking, I believed that if I clearly heard the voice of God coming from a burning bush (especially one that was not being consumed as it burned) I'd do as asked.

Next, there is the actual journey. This began with the Egyptian pharaoh’s grudging release of the Israelites from a lengthy period of slavery. This release to leave was granted only after numerous pleadings of Moses and Aaron plus a series of miraculous plagues that the Egyptians had been subjected to. The final straw, for the pharaoh, was the Passover in which all the first-born of the Egyptians were killed while all the Israelites that followed God’s instructions were spared. To my way of thinking, this would be a pretty convincing start to the journey and leave no doubt that God would remain with them.

What followed was a series of remarkable and miraculous events. To just name a few there was:

- The parting of the Red Sea

- The destruction of the Egyptian army that pursued them

- The daily visible presence of God (pillar of cloud by day – fire by night)

- All their daily needs met (provision of food and water throughout the journey and clothing and shoes that did not wear out).

All this (and much more) should have been ample evidence that they had nothing to fear…and yet we read of their many instances of complaining. It was this lack of faith and constant struggle against God’s plans for them when faced by obstacles, that turned a relatively short trip into a 40 year epic journey. When faced by challenges where the solution wasn’t immediately obvious, they were known to say that they were better off in Egypt and that Moses had brought them into the desert to perish.

While most people are aware the journey took forty years, some may not realize that the first opportunity to move into the Promised Land came after only about two and a half years. This was when they were camped close to the Promised Land and Moses sent 12 spies, ahead of the main group. They went into the land as scouts to help the Israelites prepare to move in and take what God had promised them. Ten of the spies brought back a negative, fear-filled report of giants and huge armies in the land. Despite all the amazing miracles and victories they had witnessed during the journey up to this point, they said it couldn’t be done and recommended against going forward. However, two of the spies (Caleb and Joshua) advocated they move forward in faith into the land and believed God would deliver as He had promised. The Israelites chose to accept the report of the ten negative spies and rebelled at going forward. Therefore God sent them to the desert until all those 20 years of age and over – except for Caleb and Joshua - died off. The additional thirty-seven and a half years were because the Israelites chose not to accept God’s guidance and protection.

Their long journey ended with Joshua leading the Israelites into the land as promised. God did as He had promised – He helped them defeat their enemies and gave them the land. Thus, in a much abbreviated form, we have the story of the Exodus from Egypt to the Promised Land of Canaan. End of story…right?

Ah, not so fast. It wasn't until much later in my life, that I began to realize that there is a parallel to be drawn, between the Israelites wandering, and life as it is today. My own life experience would certainly suggest this is the case. On a broader scale, how many times has a very similar story been repeated throughout our time here on this planet? I would suggest that the story of the Exodus really helps illustrate some things about human nature. There are many lessons to be learned and warnings to be mindful of. Because of the choices we make, we can spend our own prolonged period wandering and complaining within in our own wilderness. This truth applies both individually and collectively.

We know that a great human weakness is the failure to learn the lessons of history and therefore we become doomed to repeat them – sometimes over and over again. This was true for the Israelites and it was also true for those generations to follow. It should be obvious that even today, thousands of years later; there are lessons still to be learned – sometimes with painful consequences.

Even in the face of conclusive proof, doubts and fears often hold sway. Overcoming one's fears is difficult. Education by learning the facts about that which is feared is a start, but by itself it is not enough. Knowing is not the same as doing, and learning the facts about something is only one piece of the puzzle for overcoming doubt and fear. Action is also required. While the statement, “the truth shall set you free” is a fact, we need to recognize that freedom is a concept that must be exercised and acted upon. Without action we will remain just as stuck.

It seems one of the first obstacles to confront and overcome is that of instant gratification versus patiently working toward a worthwhile goal. Our culture seems driven, in many ways, by the desire for “instant gratification.” The desire to obtain or do something NOW is a powerful motivating factor; and it is costing us dearly. This “satisfy yourself now and pay later,” approach is resulting in huge and growing personal as well as national debt. It is also resulting in sometimes rash decision making which, while possibly satisfying in the short term, can ultimately lead to painful consequences resulting from poorly considered actions.

This dynamic of sacrificing patience in favour of instant gratification and self-appeasement is not only at work in a monetary sense, i.e. choices that result in mounting debt; it is also true in the long-term physical, emotional and spiritual sense as well. Such poor choices often result in painful consequences that are simply the result of engaging in behaviour that is destructive or damaging. When I look at the personal costs I’ve accumulated in my own life over the years, I can bear testimony to this fact. Some of the choices I made as a much younger person have resulted in debts I’ve had to pay and must continue paying to this day.

One lesson I’m beginning to understand (perhaps I’m just a slow learner) is that when effort precedes reward, the outcome is usually satisfying because the choices are more wisely made and can be enjoyed for quite a long time. On the other hand, anytime reward precedes effort, the resulting satisfaction very rarely lasts as long as the resulting debt or any of the other consequences.

Another obstacle to face and overcome is holding on to old ways even when God has better ways and plans for us. Albert Einstein is said to have defined insanity as, “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” This was a very keen observation of a very common human tendency. We can see evidence of this form of insanity throughout history (including the time of the Exodus) and extending through to today. This is due in part at least, to how change is perceived, the resistance to change and the comfort people often express in continuing with the familiar.

Throughout my professional career working as a nurse in a mental health setting, I could see this dynamic at work on a daily basis. It often led to some very serious and chronic problems. People with long histories of dysfunction and distress would often be able to cite what they needed to change in their life in order to resolve some very destructive problems. Yet they would continue resisting those necessary changes. Often they would begin a statement with, “I know I need to stop _____” or they might begin with, “I really need to start _____” However, even when confronted with critical advice about necessary changes - along with dire warnings of what would happen if they didn’t change, they still would often fail to follow through. Knowing and doing are two different things.

God, who knows us better than anyone, any professional advisor/worker, or even better than we know our selves has something better in mind for us and a plan to help us get there. He doesn’t stop us from determinedly continuing on our own way if we so choose. But He does let us know what to expect if we continue on the path we have chosen. He is patient with us even after we run up against the same problems over and over again. He gently lets us know that He does have a better way. He invites us to follow His plan. When I look at it in this manner, I find it hard to be too critical of the Israelites for I’m really not much different.

Another major stumbling block is having a sense of entitlement which destroys the ability to recognize one's blessings and experience gratitude. Every sunrise is a blessing. It becomes an entitlement when I begin to complain about how early I have to wake up in order to see it. How soon the things we once felt grateful for quickly become the things we expect. How easy it is to complain about the things that, not so very long ago, we were once thankful to receive. This happens when we allow showers of blessings to become lists of expectations and entitlements.

In the story of the Exodus, Israel had all their basic daily needs met. Their food, water, clothing and safety were all assured. In return, their own responsibilities were clearly spelled out for them. In terms of “job security” (using the language of today) this would appear to be the ideal arrangement or “contract.” The daily blessings in their lives were obvious. We see time and time again the complaining, doubt, fear and failure to comply on the part of such a blessed people. Miraculous occurrences could no longer be truly appreciated or enjoyed once they became something that was simply taken for granted. During their journey, Israel seemed to suffer every time they failed to regard themselves as a truly blessed people but instead regarded themselves as an entitled people.

I recognized this dynamic very quickly in the exodus of Israel but it took much, much longer before I began to see the very same dynamic at work within myself. However, while it took a while to see the connection, my life experience does parallel that of the Israelites in a number of ways:

- Too many times I can find myself doubting, complaining and failing to be thankful.

- There are many times when I find myself doing something ill-advised, on the one hand, or else failing to do some things that I know I should do, on the other.

- Then there are the times when I allow myself to become overwhelmed with fear and doubt because I’ve lost sight of God’s gifts, grace, mercy and guidance…despite the fact that I may have just recently been thankful for those very same things!

In my own life, my daily needs have been met and I’ve experienced much to be thankful for. I know that my time here will be limited and that there will be troubles and challenges ahead – this is life and true for everyone. However, to meet life’s challenges, I have been blessed with good judgment, intelligence and some excellent guidelines for living my life so as to make the best of things to come. I’ve also been assured that I’ll get all the help I need to get me through the difficulties that lie ahead and will never have to face more than I’m able to endure. As a Christian, I view all these blessings and assurances as gifts from God, given out of love, and sealed by the life, death and resurrection of Christ Jesus. With all this in mind, I’m able to move onward and need not remain forever stuck, wandering in the desert.

Road Ahead

So you’re traveling along – sometimes, barely paying attention – when out of nowhere, life happens. Well, you stop (you’ve kinda’ been forced to)… oh, and you also wake up.

So now you’re sittin’ and waitin’ till its time to start moving again. How long do ya have to wait? I don’t know. Life is like that – sometimes you get to set the pace and sometimes the pace sets you.

OK, its time. Time to start moving again… but not on the road you’ve been travelling. Nope, ’cause you see, that road is now closed – permanently. You’ve still got numerous possibilities open before you – just one road has been closed… oh, and you can’t go back. But wait, all my plans lay along that road and that’s where I thought my destination was… and now I find out the bloody road’s closed.

How ‘bout the road beside it, where’s that one go?

...Don’t know.

What’s on that road?

...Don’t know that either.

Well then, how’m I supposed to choose?

...Good question.

Can I just sit here for a while and figure this one out?

...Sure – but know this, the answer ain’t where you’re sittin’ – sooner or later you’ll have to begin moving.

This might take awhile. Think I might need some help with this one. Think I’ll close my eyes and ask.

Don’t Waste Your Time

Note:  The following was a note I wrote and posted to my Facebook page just a few weeks ago and is therefore not a brand new post.  Nevertheless, many people found the message useful and so I've decided to share it here - on my blog - with apologies to those who may have already seen and read it.

*****************

Don’t Waste Your Time

As Susan and I were going through our final three months, there were times when we both expressed regrets for mistakes made during our journey together. Several times I felt the need, in my sorrow, to apologize for every rotten thing I had ever put her through, and she repeatedly assured me of her forgiveness. She even told me time is too short and I didn’t need to keep apologizing for things in the past.

The past… To me, that is one powerful thought. The past is the place where all regrets are stored. The past is a place full of missed chances and ignored opportunities. While there is both much good and bad contained in the past, it must be realized that it is one of the places we can never get back to no matter how much we wish we could. While I was expressing the need for forgiveness, Susan not only forgave, but she also gently reminded me of the things that were good and right and for which we could be thankful.

In a conversation I had with a pastor friend, after Susan had passed away, he asked me if I had any regrets and what might they be. After giving this question several long moments of thoughtful consideration, I replied that I regretted all the wasted time and I went on to explain just what I meant. I certainly did not want to leave him with the impression that I might have viewed the time Susan and I spent together as wasted.

When two people decide to share their lives with each other to form a loving partnership, one of the most valuable resources they have – in only a limited supply – is the time they get to be together. In looking back, I can see where I wasted some of that precious time. Along with the time are the missed opportunities those moments might have contained.

As young people start out together, they tend to view their future together as “forever” and speak of the road ahead as, “the rest of our life” – without giving real thought to just what that means. This was certainly the case for me. The road ahead was to be full of countless opportunities for hugs and kisses, long walks and activities, deep/meaningful talks and loving moments together. Even though we might have had an intellectual awareness of an eventual end, I certainly didn’t grasp the reality of that fact. It is that very end that makes the intervening time such a valuable and limited gift to be cherished and not wasted.

All couples have quarrels, arguments and disagreements; working through such times is a necessary and healthy part of building a relationship together. However, I now look at the time spent holding on to anger or resentment, as wasted. How often do we get “all bent out of shape,” over some silly little thing where it seems more important to be proven “right” instead of swallowing our pride and quickly getting our relationship back on track. Behind this dynamic is always the risky belief that there will be plenty of time later to resolve any conflict.

It was during those very times that I now wonder how many opportunities, to spend loving time together, I missed . The answer is, I simply don’t know, but I do know I can never get them back. I also know that today I would handle disagreements differently if I had the chance to do things over. What matters, what would I decide if I were offered either a hug or the chance to stand there indignantly holding on to a belief that I’m right. The opportunity for the hug is gone and whether or not I was right simply doesn’t matter.

If you knew that you only had a day, a week, a month or a year left to spend with the person you love, what would you do differently? How much of that time would you be willing to waste? How much different would your priorities be? If you knew your time was limited, what is the first thing you would do? ……. Perhaps you should consider doing just that because your time is limited – don’t waste it.